Monday, November 24, 2008

Ham for Thanksgiving!

I know you're supposed to use Thanksgiving to give thanks for your family and friends...this year I'll share with you, the list of stuff you don't want to hear on Thanksgiving...

Ham on Thanksgiving:

1. I love moist turkey. Too bad your turkey came out so dry and tasteless.
2. I haven't seen mashed potatoes this lumpy since the time I had them at the Church potluck.
3. That was the best stuffing that I have ever had. What's that? I'm sorry. I didn't realize that it was Nugent's dog food.
4. Why are those cranberries crawling on the table? Oh I'm sorry. I didn't realize that they came from Hanson's and their laced with worms.
5. I never knew that you could put broccoli and cauliflower in lime Jell-o.
6. Your home is the perfect handyman's special. When do you plan to do a complete makeover?
7. Your couch is nice and comfortable. By the way, is this a pee stain?
8. Hey Honey, I think we're going to need a skill saw to cut this pumpkin pie.
9. Hey Uncle Homer, quit putting your nose up the turkey. It's so gross.
10. I've never used paper plates before for Thanksgiving. I've got to admit that you're very original and cheap.

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